There is no denying it that sex with an ex easy. After all, you know each other, you know what they like in bed, they know what you like in bed, you can be comfortable with them in bed and you don’t have to be conscious about anything. So why not do it? Besides, maybe you always wanted a relationship with no strings attached. The idea of being friends with benefits is exciting, but it doesn’t come without repercussions.
I am sure that even before you started reading this article, you know the answer to this question.
Should you have sex with your ex?
No. Plain and simple. But you just can’t seem to point out why. If you can go back in time to right after you broke up, when you were hurt and in pain, would you still want to sleep with them?
What has changed now?
The fact is, your mind is still clouded with emotions. The only difference is that you are experiencing different emotions than before. After a breakup, you go different stages of emotions. Initially, you might feel shock, anger, resentment, sorrow, and all the other stuff that makes you feel pity for yourself. After you are through that stage, you start missing your ex; you even have thoughts about getting back together (if you are absolutely sure, read this article on getting your ex girlfriend back). Add that to the fact that you haven’t been laid in a while, you start imagining sleeping with your ex. And if your ex is feeling the same things, then it just reinforces your justifications.
So why not do it?
If you have sex with an ex, you are going to end up hurting yourself or them. The feelings are bound to come back. The act maybe enjoyable but what follows will be nothing short of an emotional catastrophe. You will be confused, emotional, hopes, fears, promises and have many issues from the past.
If you think you are completely over your ex and you will not feel any emotions, then you are just kidding yourself. If you are really over your ex, then why not go out there and find someone ne
Another reason to not do it, is to think about what message this will send to your ex. You are just telling them that you are still dependent on them. You are telling them that they are your only option. You are telling them that you can’t go out there and find someone for yourself.
But the biggest reason to not do it is that by having sex with your ex, you are moving a step backwards. The whole point of a breakup is to MOVE ON with your life. Not move backwards.
How to Stop It?
Just don’t do it. In fact, don’t contact your ex at all. If they contact you, don’t answer. You are not liable to answer your phone calls every time someone calls you. If you are in a situation where you have to be in contact with your ex and they propose sex, have a little self-control and say no. Saying no to your ex will only empower you.
If you haven’t already, it’s time to go no-contact. Work on building your life without your ex. Sleeping with your ex simply means that you are still depending on them for something. And if you want to have a satisfying and happy relationship with someone in the future, you will have to remove your ex from your mind and your life completely.